Sun Nov 18, 2018 11:51 am
#1651673
I ordered some bread rolls that were so shiny I took them back the baker to complain. I went in with all buns glazing.
I just had a row with my personal trainer. Am in a state of physical pique.
I was trying to lose weight but the exercise bike at my local gym kept calling me nasty names, which put me off going... It's a vicious cycle.
I got booed by my family and friends because the fireworks I lit went off in the wrong sequence... Bang out of order...
A playwright walks into an ancient Greek tailors with a pair of torn trousers. Tailor says, "Euripides?" The customer replies "Yes! Eumenides?"
My mate got rushed into hospital last night because he swallowed a vacuum cleaner. Just phoned the hospital to see how he is and they say he’s picking up...
They told me I'd never be good at poetry because I'm dyslexic. But so far I've made 3 jugs and a vase and they’re lovely.
Legless parrot available, free to a good home... No perches necessary....
Last time I went to the airport I queued up at a table with some feathery birds laying eggs on it... I’d gone to the chicken desk by mistake...
I just had a row with my personal trainer. Am in a state of physical pique.
I was trying to lose weight but the exercise bike at my local gym kept calling me nasty names, which put me off going... It's a vicious cycle.
I got booed by my family and friends because the fireworks I lit went off in the wrong sequence... Bang out of order...
A playwright walks into an ancient Greek tailors with a pair of torn trousers. Tailor says, "Euripides?" The customer replies "Yes! Eumenides?"
My mate got rushed into hospital last night because he swallowed a vacuum cleaner. Just phoned the hospital to see how he is and they say he’s picking up...
They told me I'd never be good at poetry because I'm dyslexic. But so far I've made 3 jugs and a vase and they’re lovely.
Legless parrot available, free to a good home... No perches necessary....
Last time I went to the airport I queued up at a table with some feathery birds laying eggs on it... I’d gone to the chicken desk by mistake...