PP,
From a VFR point of view I agree that there is a a tendancy for many people to use FS the wrong way. Many people start off using it as a game, practising IFR flying way before they ever understand what limited use of instruments a VFR pilot needs.
I made a conscious choice to use FS for VFR purposes about a year or so before I ever had the chance to start flying for real. With the aid of friends who were pilots, I made an effort only to fly GA types and fly by visual references.
I haven't encountered any criticism of my real-world technique even though the instructors know of my use of FS.
It has to be realised that FS as a VFR aid IS limited. The lack of feeling in the "seat of the pants" necessarily makes it so. But I have found it valuable for practing the following techniques:
1. R/T - this has been the BIGGEST benefit. Getting over the fear/embarrassment factor of talking to someone in a different "language" and getting this technique engrained in the mind. But of course as mentioned before you need to use the services of the online flying community (
http://www.vatsim.net and
http://www.cambridgeflyingclub.com)
2. Procedures - As you say if you don't fly that often, going through the procedures (FREDA, BUMPFFICHHLC, etc) while handling the workload on the simulator helps to also engrain these procedures so that the amount of time re-practicing them while paying lots of dosh in the realworld is reduced.
3. Using the VFR scenery - practicing Nav exercises. In this regard most of the valuse is in the pre-flight planning, going through the process of getting real-world NOTAMs, WX from the metoffice and then checking the accuracy of the nav against the VRPs in the Flight Sim. In some way its a bit like flying on a day with poor Vis. You can't see the VRP's until you're nearly at them, but it's quite a nice feeling having plotted the track/headings etc to find that after x planned minutes since the last VRP you are actually overhead your next one.
So horses for courses. If you've got the right PC kit and the right discipline to use FS in a constructive way I think it can add value.
Neil