[Hackett]

I still to this day have to have a toilet trip before every flight, my partner thinks it's very amusing and that I should have "nervous poo" as part of my checklist. No idea why because as soon as I'm in the aircraft I feel completely calm but 15 mins before I feel all excited and full of butterflies.

[Danny]

I deal with my nerves by reminding myself that I am not committed to the flight until the wheels leave the grass and have on a couple of occasions shut down the engine and gone to see if an instructor was available which has resulted in some very productive revision flights.

[Anon]

Strange, but I was just about to post here about some aviating I did a couple of days ago that was so far below par that I do wonder if I should continue. I often really struggle to overcome nerves before flying and it affects me physically as well as mentally (I spend a considerable amount of time relieving the contents of my digestive system before the first flight of the day)

I also have a rule of 3 (similar to that mentioned by another poster) and I seriously broke that. That has thinking even more about what I may allow to go wrong in future.

If I'm honest I generally try and find a reason NOT to fly and only if I can't, do I take-off. If it weren't for the fact that I am addicted to the view I would give it all up today.

While I've never gone as far as getting MEP or Instructor privileges, I can certainly relate to your feeling of foreboding. As a matter of interest are there other fears or intense dislikes that you suffer from. I really hate heights (cliff edges, top of tall structures) and fairground rides that involve vertical movements.

[Chris-tt]

Is it prossible you have some form of mild depression? I certainly get nervous on occasions about flying, especially when it's challenging weather conditions, or I'm going somewhere new. I quite often struggle to sleep the night before, going through loads of stuff in my head from radio calls, to forced landing procedures. The palms of my hands sometimes even get sweaty just thinking about it.
However when I wake up in the morning I'm like a kid on Christmas day, and excited, reading the other posts perhaps I turn that nervousness into excitement without thinking about it! During the end of my PPL training I had to cancel a few lessons, as I just didn't sleep the night before and wasn't fit to fly.

You wouldn't be where you are today with such experience and ratings, unless you really enjoyed flying, hence why I'm putting it out there that you might be slightly depressed, and not even realising it.

[yawningdog]

Sorry, I haven't read all the replies. I wrote a detailed article on Pilot Flight Anxiety for GASL several years ago.

My initial feedback is that "currency" is the main thing followed by feeling secure, could you try an aerobatics course, or fly an aircraft with a parachute. Makes a huge difference.

[dreamer]

Hi - I also get that feeling sometimes - have never identified a cause and nothing has ever come of it. But I wonder could yours be adrenaline related?

I used to race cars and often sat in the assembly area (where you get into grid order before driving out to the grid) thinking "why the hell am I doing this I hate it." I came close a few times to just getting out of the car, walking away, and leaving it there. Of course as soon as the lights went out and the race started, I got the biggest rush of my life. The negativity before-hand is correlated to the size of the rush! (and the corresponding low the week after).

Could this be the case with you? Do you enjoy it once you're up and after you've got down? Is it just the build up to going up?

[Anon]

Hello All,

Firstly, thanks for the replies, I have read them all and thought them through. Since initially posting I have had a number of discussions, one with a professional and the others with friends.

The upshot is that I had some baggage from my military service (14Coy/ SRR) which seems to have left me with a internal sense of impostor phenomenon. Whether this is a real psychological term or not I have still yet to read up on. Is does fit with how I feel internally though, insofar as flights, before which I am nervous, should be well within my capability and probably are on paper but I don't think they are. I am told the reason that this has happened is in part because in my military career I did a very specialist role and as such my sense of self-worth was high and reinforced by the role and position. In my civilian role I no longer have this specialist role so have been left with the residue feeling of being an imposter. Not sure I understand the linkage yet.

Maintaining a high level of currency will help here I am sure as will a kick up the butt

[Cricket23]

I'm not an expert, but you might want to look into 'cognitive behaviour therapy'. This may help you to understand what's going on and may help you to re-programme the brain.

[AFSAG]

You are describing the effects of excess adrenaline. Paul mentions a dry mouth after early days in the bulldog- thats a classic adrenaline effect too.

Adrenaline is a stress hormone, designed in small short bursts to improve performance. It also gives one a feeling of "impending doom"

So, have you always felt like this, or only since some adverse event?

CBT is a good suggestion to help you get to the underlying cause of this, and get some strategies to reframe it.

eg - "I feel like it again, thats OK, its just my adrenaline" is a better thought process than "I feel ****, Im going to die" but someone telling you that won't really help, you need to get it ingrained for yourself.

Hope that helps a bit.

Andrew